Thursday, January 10, 2013

A Very Good Surprise

Hello again!

Things change... this is one realization I had over the past six months.

Over the past six months I had a number of changes........

  1. I graduated High School
  2. I started college
  3. I got stuck between two friends
  4. I managed to rock my first semester of college
  5. I was set up with a really great guy :)

So as you can see from my previous posts, life has started to get better. Yes I still do have my times of weakness but life was slowly looking up. UNTIL TODAY. Yes here we go the crazy girl is sad once again. I miss my "boy toy" as we have been calling him and today was the first day of my second semester. It was interesting to say the least

Not Such a Blast from the Past......

So today I went to school as usual but something terrible happened. Ladies, I am talking to you..... you know that feeling when you run into your ex and you are like wtf?! Well I had that happen today but instead of the ex just being a normal ex-boyfriend, it was my anti-christ of an ex. There is a long story to this but lets just say that he cheated on me and it was a very traumatic relationship. So I didn't technically talk to him though.... I saw him and than everything to avoid being seen............ yeah I am a little bit of a coward. But I'm a coward ninja!

But as I sat in my Government class..... I kept remembering all the bad things that happened in our relationship. I was getting ready to sob in my class but instead tried to get ahold of one of my friends. And btw I'm in college and I understand that time is a luxury but seriously?! I couldn't get ahold of anyone. Except for one person who I am kind of friends with...... my friend's ex-boyfriend. *Note that I do not have nor do I ever expect to have romantic feelings towards him.*

Serious FML

Sororities.... Friend or Foe?

This was written awhile ago but I found it and found it interesting...

Well hello there... So I have updates. For one this is not going to be a really "whiny" post.  I know that some of the people that are keeping up with this will be relieved.. hehe.  Anyway I am starting to get used to college....... not that I actually like it.... in fact I still hate it. "Paige" tensions are still high... even though I said I wasn't going to talk about her anymore... I kind of need to. This WILL be the last time. Also my other friend I am going to call her "Anastasia" has been awesome. She has really stepped it up since "Paige" has kind of turned into a sorority girl. Did I tell you guys that?

Anyway I love work. That isn't something an 18 year old really says, but I am. Lately I have gone to my coworkers for advice and Friday...... we talked about sororities. Now for all you "greek" people in sororities and frats, I have nothing against you personally. I am just stating common thoughts about them. Anyway they brought up a few good points.

  1. You change especially in sororities. You could be the sweetest people on Earth, but if you aren't careful... you change. For instance I knew someone besides paige that was soooo sweet and than she rushed and now she thinks she is better than everybody else who is not into the greek life.
  2. You basically pay for your friends... It's true....
  3. They are like cults. 
  4. It is hard to talk to a friend that is in a sorority.... trust me it is. 
That is just a few of the points. But starting with point 4, it really is true.... Just the other day, "Paige" and I had a conversation and we were talking and I was filling her in on what has been going on back home. I said something about it not being the same here and I am not the same anymore..... and she agreed. I asked her what she meant and she said that I have been hiding more... Yes, I will admit that I haven't told her everything... but honestly what can she do when she is 200 miles away? The most she can do is pretend to listen and reply with "I'm sorry." ANYWAY, I went on the defensive and told her that it was basically the pot calling the kettle black and that she doesn't tell me anything anymore anyway. She replies that there is nothing to tell but....... sorority stuff....... that is when I really noticed it.  
I want to tell her that I am sorry for writing about her again.... but I'm not. She won't listen to my texts messages and I need to write all this out. I have had enough emotional breakdowns. I need my best friend and hopefully she is still there. 

So "Anastasia" is my other best friend. "Paige" and her used to be friends but that is a long story. Anyway lately I have been calling her when I need someone. I called her the night my dog died..... "Paige" was at rush and could't talk. Anyway "Anastasia" let me just cry and tried to get me to calm down. That is what I needed. She has been there for me and I love her for that. 

Now again I want to clarify, that "Paige" is not a bitch. She is one of the most down to earth people I know but lately she has adapted to fit college... and I guess you can say I haven't. If I am writing her out to be a bitch... she really isn't. I am just venting cause she can't always be here for me like she has been in the past. I miss her... that's all. Also I would like to add I am not against Sororities.... They just aren't for me. I considered it and decided that it just wasn't what I want to do. Anyway I am done venting for the night.