Monday, August 13, 2012

How do you spell Clarification?

So I really feel the need to clarify something. In my last post I talked about my friend a little bit. Now I need to elaborate a little. This girl... I'm going to call her Paige... has been a friend of mine for years. She and I used to joke around saying that we couldn't get rid of one another cause we knew too much. Anyway the stuff she has to put up with me is what made me think of myself as the "charity case" friend. I actually considered her to be my best friend. But now that she has moved off to college, can she still be my best friend? Please can somebody help me?! Cause I have never had this happen to me and I have no flippin' idea what to do! There are times when I think that I can keep her as a lifelong friend and than there are times when I just want to pull away cause I don't want to be left standing if our friendship ends. I have had enough heartache in my life to last me till I'm 50 and I don't know if I can take it. SO the real question here is:

To stay or to go?

Every single one of my close friends in my life has had a part of my heart but most of it is gone now. Can I take someone else in my life leaving? Answer is IDK. I'm trying to ween off communication a little but I'm failing at it. People told me saying goodbye to someone you love was hard but couldn't they clarify a little that goodbye freaking sucks?

And as to the whole "oh you two can always talk" thing... I have one word to say to that...... Bullshit!
If I didn't say little things for her to see when she was able to check her phone (she has been really busy) We wouldn't say anything at all to each other. SO people of the universe you can't say I didn't try. So I have a feeling by the end of this... I will either have lost my best friend completely or I just have a good friend.

Can you guess which one I'm hoping for?

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